Cartman's play: a child's play south park crossover
by Movie guy 94
Summary: What happens when Cartman accidentally stumbles upon the infamous red-haired, knife wielding, killer doll, Chucky. (mostly a remake of child's play, but in the south park universe, set in-between season 2 and 3)
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: I know this is more of a crossover, but since the only think that is related to the child's play universe is Chucky himself, other than that, it's strictly within the south park universe. Now, let's have some fun**

**P.S. all of the characters in this story belong to either Matt Stone and Trey Parker, or Don Mancini.**

"I'm chasing the suspect into a toy store." officer Barbrady said into his Wilkie-talkie. He was chasing Charles Lee Ray, one of the most notorious serial killers in South Park history. He had murdered over a dozen people, and had no intention of stopping any time soon. Once Barbrady saw him, he he shot his gun directly into the killer's back, which led to Charles shooting the cop in the shoulder. "Alright, case closed, there's nothing to see here." Barbrady announced once he collapsed.

Clutching at his back, Charles suddenly saw the solution to his problem, an entire isle of "nice guy" dolls. Without a second thought, he grabbed the Voodoo necklace from around his neck, and began the ritual, to transfer his soul into the doll. "Aday du-ay dumbella, Aday du-ay dumbella, give me the power, I beg of you!" he commanded. He repeated this chant several times, until lightning began to strike rapidly around the store, then suddenly, a bolt of lightning came through the roof and struck Charles and the doll in their chests.

When the lightning finally stopped, Charles felt himself being lifted up, he looked down and saw his human body, as well as the doll's, underneath him. After floating for about 10 seconds, he felt himself being sucked into the doll; everything went dark, until he was sitting down, and his eyes were closed. When he opened them, he saw his human body, lying motionless beside him; the ritual was a success! "Ha ha motherfuckers, I'm still alive, ha!" he shouted, in his new plastic body. When the cops came back into the building, to find out what the hell just happened, Chucky quickly sat back down, and held his breath (although, he no longer needed oxygen) as the cops carefully examined the area.

Elsewhere, Eric Cartman was sitting on the couch, eating chessy poofs, with Mr. Kitty at his feet, trying to get to his snack. "No, Mr. Kitty, these are my cheesy poofs!" Cartman yelled "Maw!" the cat replied "No Kitty, these are my cheesy poofs!" Cartman shouted, they wentpack and forth for awhile, Cartman sounding more and more like a squealing pig each time, until...

"Avalable_ now, from buttplug's toys: Nice Guys, these dolls are four feet tall, they walk, they talk, and they can even fart!" _the tv ad announced, with Cartman jumping up and down on the couch in excitement. "Mom, can I get the new Nice Guy doll today, before Kyle gets one, so I can make him super jealous at school ant he'll cry?" Cartman asked, trying to sound as sweet as possible

"Okay poopiecens, I'll get you one tomarrow." she replied, sweetly "But mom, I need it for tomarrow!" he said "Oh, but Itdone think I have time to get it today, how about youll have it waiting for you when you get home from school tomarrow." she replied "BUT MEME, I NEED TO GET IT TODAY SO THAT I CAN MAKE KYLE JEALOUS AND HE'LL CRY AND KILL HIMSELF!" Cartman shouted, sounding like a squeezing pig again "Okay muffin, let's go." she replied, dropping everything that she was doing, grabbed her purse, took her son's hand, and walked out the door. "Sweet" Cartman said, victoriously

**Author's note: what do you guys think so far, love it, hate it, please discuss, more chapters to come **


	2. Chapter 2

Within 15 minutes, Eric and his mother had arrived at the toy store. Cartman had expected to be the one of the few customers at the store, but he was wrong. When they walked inside, children were running around the store, trying to grab their own nice guy doll; apparently, Cartman wasn't the only one who saw the ad. Just as Cartman was about to grab the red-haired one, someone else tried to snatch it from him. It was the blonde-haired boy in the orange hoodie, Kenny McCormick.

"Kenny, I saw it first!" Cartman claimed

"No you didn't, fudge packer, I did!" Kenny replied, barely audible, due to his hoodibe being pulled up over his head

They each tugged on the doll back and forth for a while, untill they heard, what sounded like an irritated growl from the doll. Getting irritated himself, Cartman instantly found a solution. "Kenny look, it's a dollar, you want it, go get it!" Cartman said, throwing the five-dollar bill as far as he could; and almost on instinct, Kenny chased it onto the street, only for a plane to inexplicably land on top of him, killing him. "Oh my god, they killed Kenny, you bastards." Cartman quickly said, with the now chuckling doll in his arms. Without anymore distractions, Cartman calmly walked over to the cash register, and bought his doll, then met his mother in the car.

"Oh poopiecens, I'm afraid your little friend Kenny was just hit by a plane in front of the store." his mother said "I know I saw." he replied "Mom, can we go to happy burger?" he asked "Sure, hon." she replied

_"God, it's gonna be a gigantic pain in the ass to drop that weight once I take over that kid's body. Ah fuck it, I'll just get Liveosuction or some shit."_ Chucky thought to himself as he sat in the back seat of the car

**AUTHOR'S NOTE: I know, short chapter, but don't worry, they'll get longer; I'm really excited to see how the banters between Cartman and Chucky turn out though**

**P.S. any suggestions are welcome, I want to make the best story possible, and that means that it has to be hilarious.**


	3. Chapter 3

After they picked up dinner at the happy burger drive-thru, Mrs. Cartman drove her son home, and sent him up to his room while she prepared for work. Cartman still didn't know what his mother did for a living, other than that she was constantly shown on the cover of "Crackwhore" magazine, she would always say that she would need to use her mouth muscles as little as possible at night before she left for work, and the lingerie she'd wear every night would have several white stains by the time her sift ended.

"You're alive aren't you?" Cartman asked, as if he was interrogating the doll "Yeah, what are you gonna do about it?" Chucky asked, springing to life "Nothing" Cartman replied, calmly "To be honest, this kind of crap happens all the time around here." Cartman continued, with Chucky looking dumbfounded "What are you talking about, I'm a living doll!?" Chucky asked, somewhat irritated "So, I dug up two ancient triangles, which some bitch named Barbra Strisand stole from me, connected together, and turned into a 150 foot robot dinosaur." Cartman replied

"Wait, didnt some kid named Kyle find it, and you were the fat kid, telling news reporters that you found it, and he stole it from you?" Chucky asked

"Okay, A, I'm not fat, I'm big boned, and B, after he stole it from me, I stole it back, but then Barbra Strisand took it." Cartman replied, slightly pissed off

The two of them talked for a while, both of them soon found the friend that they had been searching for. Although Chucky was still considering putting his soul into cartman's body, he was aldo begining to look for alternative bodies for himself. Mrs. Cartman had asked her friend Frita to watch Eric for the night, he didn't think much of her; she had been a prostitute for over 35 years, until her "boss" fired her because she kept giving her clients herpes. She and Eric didn't really get along, their conversations usually consisted of her telling him to do something, and him yelling at her until he ran out of energy.

Once Cartman went to bed, Chucky snuck downstairs to the sleeping woman on the couch, took Mrs. Cartman's bong that she hid in her closest, and hit Frita on the head with it, killing her. Hearing the commotion, Cartman walked downstairs, and saw the woman's dead body on the couch.

"What the hell just happened?" Cartman asked, in a groggy vioce

"I killed her with your mom's bong." Chucky replied, as if it wasn't a big deal

Oh, I'm going back to bed." Cartman said

"Wait, you're not even gonna call the cops?" Chucky asked, confused

"I'll do it in the morning, but my mom will probably just hide the body though." Cartman replied

"God, this is a fucked up town." Chucky mumbled to himself as he sat on the recliner, turning on the tv, while Cartman went back to his room


	4. Chapter 4

Chucky, for the most part, considered himself an atheist, he would simply say "There is no God; life's just a bitch, and then you die." Although, it is believed that he would just say this because he knew that he would likely go to hell when he dies, this is likely the reason why he became so obsessed with voodoo rituals; he'd do anything to stay out of hell.

Mrs. Cartman arrived home at about 2:30 a.m., by then, Chucky had fallen asleep on the recliner, with the tv still on, and the dead hooker only four feet away (which had finally crapped it's pants). Without noticing the tv still being on, and the decomposing body right next to it, Mr. Cartman when upstairs and changed into a night gown. Seeing his window of opportunity, Chucky quickly but quietly walked up to cartman's room, laid down on the floor, and went back to sleep.

"Oh dear." Mrs. Cartman said calmly when she saw the body on the floor. Grabbing a shovel and a trash bag, she took the body out back, and buried it, then when to bed.

"I just realized..." Cartman said, once he got out of bed the next morning "I haven't told my friends about you yet." "so" Chucky replied "So, they'll get super jealous and maybe Kyle will cry." Cartman said walking toward the phone. "I guess this will be entertaining." Chucky muttered to himself

"Stan, get Kyle, and get over here!" cartman commanded into his phone

"Why?" Stan asked

"Just get over here, there's somethiyour need to show you." Cartman answered

"fine" Stan replied

Within an hour, Stan and Kyle began to head over to see what Cartman had to show them. "Did Cartman say what this is about?" Kyle asked, suspiciously "No, he just said he needed to show us something." Stan answered "I hope he isn't just showing us one of his turds again." Kyle replied as they walked up to the door

"What's this about, fatass?" Kyle asked Cartman when he opened the door "Just follow me upstairs, butt-munches." Cartman said "This better not be another turd, Cartman." Stan replied "Just come with me." Cartman said, walking into his room

"God damn, what's that smell?" Stan and kyle asked, covering their noses with their mittens

"Oh yeah, me and Chucky just had breakfast burritos." Cartman said "Whait, who's Chucky?" they asked "He's my new Nice Guy doll." Cartman answered "It's okay, you can come out now." Cartman announced, glancing at his toy chest

Suddenly, the chest opened, and Chucky quickly jumped out. "I'm Chucky, wanna play?" Chucky asked, followed by a menecing laugh

Instantly, the other two boys jumped and screamed "JESUS CHRIST, where the hell did you get that thing!?" they asked "I AM *NOT* A THING!" Chucky replied furiously

"Isn't he awsome, you guys?" Cartman asked with excitement "No, he seems like he's insane." Stan replied

The two of them spent the rest of the day getting to know cartman's new "friend". They did eventually warm up to him (although, Cartman told Chucky, before they arrived, not to mention his previous life as a serial killer). Cartman eventually started dropping hints at making Chucky Kenny's replacement, which Stan was begining to consider, while Kyle was still suspicious about this situation. He couldn't put his finger on it, but Kyle still felt like something was off about Chucky, and he was determined to find out the truth about him.

**Author's note: this story still has a while to go, but I'm just letting everyone know that I'm planning on doing a Carrie story after this; it's within the same universe as the new movie. I'm not going to give anything away, but it will act as an alternative ending to the story, it's partialy inspired by the rumored post-credits scene that turned out to be false.**

**P.S. Thanks for all of the great review so far, it's given me a lot of extra confidence with my stories.**

**P.P.S. I'm just letting everyone know, this story will NOT have any romance, it's strictly comedic**

**:)**


	5. Chapter 5

"Hey Stan" Kyle asked as the two of them walked away from cartman's house

"yeah" Stan replied

"do you think something seemed kinda 'off' about that chucky doll?"

"I don't know, maybe a little, but I don't think it's anything to be worried about; but I am curious about how he became a living doll. Last time I checked, the nice guy dolls only say like six diffrent phrases." Stan said

"Well I'm going to see if I can find any information on this." Kyle said as he headed towards his house

"Okay, later dude." Stan said as they parted ways

Kyle was raised in a strict, Jewish family. His father, Gerald, was a lawyer, he was often calm and even tempered, unlike his wife, sheila. Sheila was the dominate member of the family, she was a strict, stay at home mom; she was often referred to, by Cartman (behind her back) as a "stupid bitch". Although harsh, even Kyle occasionally agreed with this whenever his mother would go to far with something, such as when she made the entire town take down their Christmas decorations because it was "offensive to the Jewish community" but her family was pretty much the Jewish community in south park.

"Kyle, dinner will be ready in about an hour." his mom announced from the kitchen as he walked in the door

"okay mom" Kyle replied as he walked upstairs to his computer

Once Kyle got onto the Internet, he quickly got to work on finding out more about cartman's new doll. It took Kyle a while to find anything, untill he got to the police report about the supposed death of serial killer, Charles lee ray. "oh shit." Kyle said after he read the report. "Kyle, dinner is ready, go get Ike up from his nap." his mom said

"So, how was your day, Kyle?" Sheila asked as everyone sat down "Well, Cartman got a nice guy doll, who is possibly a serial killer who transferred his soul into the doll to stay out of hell." Kyle quickly said "WHAT WHAT WHAT!?" his mom replied

**Author's note: I know, another short chapter. To be honest, I don't actually have a complete outline of how I want the story to go, I'm mostly just playing it by year. Also, how am I doing with the 90's setting, I don't remember it that much because I was born in '95.**

**P.S. the begining to my Carrie story will be up in a few days, I'm thinking about titling it either Carrie: new beginnings, Carrie: a fresh start, or Carrie: a new dawn; it's within the same universe** **as the new movie, but it's plot is partially inspired by the tv series that NBC tried to start a few years ago.**


	6. Chapter 6

On the following Monday, Kyle and Stan waited at the bus stoThor their bus to take them to school. "Oh I forgot to ask, did you find anything about the Chucky doll?" Stan asked, Kyle was about to answer when Cartman, Chucky showed up "Hey dudes" Cartman said, just as the bus showed up

"Come on, we're runnin' late!" the bus driver, Ms. Crabtree announced "Aw shut up, you ugly cunt!" Chucky replied "WHAT DID YOU SAY!?" she asked, getting in his face and making him jump back "I said I like Alan Funt." he replied, almost about to shit his pants "Oh, me too." she said

A few minutes later, they had finally arrived at the school. Their teacher, Mr. Garrison wasn't your average teacher. He rarely taught his students anything, other than stuff like "which Playboy bunny has herpes and which one has crabs", but at least they were learning something.

"Mr. Garrison, can I use the bathroom?" Kyle asked "I don't know Kyle, did you ask Mr. Hat?" Mr. Garrison asked "I don't want to ask Mr. Hat, I'm asking you!" Kyle replied, frustrated "Oh I think you better ask Mr. Hat." Mr. Garrison said calmly "Mr. Hat, may I please use the bathroom?" kyle asked the puppet on his teacher's hand "Well Kyle, NO, YOU HEAR ME, YOU GO TO HELL, YOU GO TO HELL AND YOU DIE!" Mr. Hat replied "Well Kyle, I guess you better take your seat." Mr. Garrison said

"Damnit" Kyle exclaimed, walking back to his desk "Ha ha, Mr. Hat yelled at you." Cartman said

Kyle was finally able to talk to Stan during recess, while Cartman and Chucky played hide and seek (Cartman was the one who was hiding). "What were you about to say when we were at the bus stop?" Stan asked "I was saying that I looked up the doll, and one of the first things that came up was a news report talking about a serial killer who did some kind of voodoo ritual which transferred his soul into a Nice Guy doll." Kyle replied "What was the killer's name?" Stan asked "Charles Lee Ray" Kyle said

"JESUS CHRIST, do you think Cartman knows about this!?" Stan asked, mortified "I don't know, probably." Kyle replied "God only knows what could happen if the two of them work together." Stan sighed "Yeah I know." Kyle said "We need to get that doll away from him and kill it."

Suddenly, the two of them heard a helpless scream, only for it to abruptly stop. The boys realized that it was coming from the nurse's office. When they reached the office, they saw the nurse's mutilated corpse. The body belonged to none other than Nurse Gollum, the dead fetus had been ripped off of her head, and her throat had been ripped out.

**Author's note: I'm back, I'm sorry that I took so long, but I wanted to Finnish a few chapters of my Carrie story.**

**P.S. this was originally going to be a remake of the first child's play, but with south park characters, but I decided to take abore original route with the story.**


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